the first day of the rest of my life

so we all say at sometime or other "this is the first day of the rest of my life", however i actually had one of those moments today. often it takes a serious step outside your normal (whatever that is) lifestyle to realise it. ok, it may sound huge and life-changing (perhaps it is), but i have to warn you before you read on, it's certainly not one of those life and death situations.. it's just about balancing wherever i am now (generally~ life in london, studying, searching for the next step, trying to become famous etc.. joking about that last thing) with what i really want out of the various situations and places i find myself in at the moment as well as my musical journey into the unknown.

i'm currently in hong kong, it's well past midnight and tomorrow i'm due to fly back to london to resume my studies at the guildhall school of music & drama. i've had a week out of my latest routine in london to investigate a few external projects, which ultimately i've found, feed back in to my studies. i've been in quite some frustration as to whether i'm doing the right thing (the whole thing of studying i mean) and whether they can deliver what i really want. as i said though, i had this revelation today and i feel refreshingly invigorated.. 

the interesting thing is that until now, i've also escaped the academic world to some extend, or rather, i've haven't had a great desire to investigate the academic nature of my musical aesthetic. that is, i haven't felt it necessary to explain why i create and how i create, except for the fact that it is me expressing myself and my experiences, sometimes perhaps in relation to visuals and responding to another artistic aesthetic. i've just had this vague removed obsession to be respected by the academic industry of music, whether that be classical, contemporary, avant garde, conceptual composition (the list goes on).. however it's only now, by taking some time in hong kong and chatting with a great old friend king pan ng, who i studied with during my undergrad at melbourne university 12 or so years ago, that i realise that it is that particular challenge of 'reading' exactly what my musical aesthetic is, that is how i will truly be able to express in perfect form (for me) what i do, how i do, why i do whatever it is that i do (i'm training to be a magician for those who don't know). i understand of course that it will change, develop, evolve, afterall that is the nature of life, and that is the exciting thing, however what i'm trying to say, long-windedly, is that i finally want to articulate in words, what i'm doing, in such a way that it can help my growth as an artiste (or magician). perhaps it can also help me to develop my audience outside my usual streams of searching.

here's a pic of king pan at the piano, talking, playing, rabbiting on..

here's a couple of pics of king pan and i rabbiting on about musical aesthetics...

oops, i didn't agree with this one. 

and last night i went to macau to visit a casino 'the city of dreams', which is not a usual haunt, however i went to see the 'house of dancing water'. it's a spectacle theatre show of sorts for the masses, revolving around a giant pool of water. soo amazing the scale of it, entertaining, wonderful divers, professional performers, acrobatics, theatrical moments (as well as some cheesy ones!).. i took just one pic before my desire to just watch instead of document came through...

ok just looked at the clock and realised it's waay past my bedtime to do what i need to do tomorrow before i fly back to london.... more about my musical aesthetic later, but for now, it's been a truly great venture to hong kong and the many hidden gems it has..

hong kong, til next time...

ps. so many stories still to come!!